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| my entrance date is drawing nearer and nearer. :D
10 days. and i just keep smiling.
O dearest Mary, totus tuus! <3
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| "I worry some of you still have not really met Jesus one-to-one, you
and Jesus alone. We may spend time in chapel, but have you seen with
the eyes of your soul how he looks at you with love? Do you really know
the living Jesus, not from books but from being with him in your heart?
Have you heard the loving words he speaks to you? Ask for the grace: he
is longing to give it. Until you can hear Jesus in the silence of your
own heart, you will not be able to hear him saying "I thirst" in the
hearts of the poor. Never give up this daily intimate contact with
Jesus as the real living person, not just the idea. How can we last
even one day without hearing Jesus say "I love you"? Impossible. Our
soul needs that as much as the body needs to breathe the air. If not,
prayer is dead, meditation, only thinking. Jesus wants you each to hear
him speaking in the silence of your heart. Be careful of all that can
block that personal contact with the living Jesus. The devil may try to
use the hurts of life, and sometimes our own mistakes, to make you feel
it is impossible that Jesus really loves you, is really cleaving to
you. This is a danger for all of us. And so sad, because it is
completely the opposite of what Jesus is really wanting, waiting to
tell you. Not only that he loves you, but even more, he longs for you.
He misses you when you don't come close. He thirsts for you. He loves
you always, even when you don't feel worthy. When not accepted by
others, even by yourself sometimes, he is the one who always accepts
you. Only believe, you are precious to him. Bring all you are suffering
to his feet; only open your heart to be loved by him as you are. He
will do the rest." | | |
| i've been thinking all day to find just the right words to tell you, and it's hard for me to say this, but i don't know how else to say it. so i'm just going to come right out with it. *deep breath.
there's a reason why i haven't been writing in you for a while, even after my recent self-proclaimed resolution to do so. and that reason is.. i found another online journal to confide my thoughts in.
i'm sorry, i really am. it wasn't anything you did, honest. i just, i don't know how it happened. all i remember was that i was bored one day in the school's library, and i thought to myself, "it would be so cool to have a personal online journal." and i did think of you.. but, i wanted a new untouched online journal. don't get me wrong, you've been great to me, and that's what's so hard about this.
it would be unfair to you if i just carried on and pretended i'm devoted to only you. so i hope the feelings are mutual about separating. i think it's for the best. i hope you agree.
i can't promise i'll begin writing in you again, but i will come and visit to read my xanga subscriptions. that's alright, isn't it?
so, i guess this is goodbye. i don't know the next time i'll come and update to let you know how i'm doing. but don't worry, i'll take care of myself. and i know, you'll always be around for me. thanks for that.
farewell, my dearest xanga.
sincerely,
-sara | | |
| who knew people still used xanga? well, i still log on every once in a while to read up on my subscriptions--you guys are great, i love reading what you post.
so, as i've been reading, i've noticed a growing want in me to update this thing.. but every time i log on, i just stare at my page, listen to the song (which is AWESOME), and click around. i want to say something exciting that proves i've grown since i last updated this, cuz it's been a lonnggg while since i have written something in here. but.. i have no idea what to say. so here's what my friend hannah suggested:
smilinlil lamb (10:26:14 PM): i'm looking at my xanga, wanting to update it.. but i don't have anything to say
ajkflshannah (10:26:26 PM): say
ajkflshannah (10:27:15 PM): hi my name is sara !  and i love Jesus, and i love summer, and i love hannah . and im the nicest person youll ever met in your life according to hannah. and have a nice day
smilinlil lamb (10:27:33 PM): k
ajkflshannah (10:28:31 PM): and mama Mary ! i really love mama Mary. and all the Saints in Heaven, and GOD who is the reason why im here now. and Jesus is the reason for the season
ajkflshannah (10:28:34 PM): that too !
smilinlil lamb (10:28:41 PM): k
perhaps i'll update this more now. we'll see. or well, i'll see. no one reads this anymore anyway, aha. | | |
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